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| Blogs > tomfun691 > Fun and Laughter |
not in touch
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not in touch This was written by a guy... it's pretty damn smart. I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart. FOR EXAMPLE: One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, “I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me." I said, "WHAT??!! What was that?!" So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear... "You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to my puzzled look by saying "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?" Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Lets get a pair for each outfit." We went on to the jewellery department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I "That's fine,honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier." I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it." Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, "WHAT?" I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added,"Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?" Apparently I'm not having sex tonight ...but at least that bitch knows I'm smarter than her. |
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1/16/2008 2:41 pm |
OMG this is wonderful!!!!!!!!!!! Please tell me it is true and not just a clever story, it's great...I can not wait to show this to hubbie! Thank you so much for making my day! I am Stephanie by the way and a newbie to the blog world but you are without a doubt on my must watch list! Steph
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2/6/2008 6:53 pm |
OH He so made his point! I would have dropped dead that instant!!! OMG ha ha ha ha...Yeah. That was entertaining, but you know...he might have screwed himself silly because I wouldn't be giving it up for a while!!!!
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